If you want to make a dangerous man your friend, let him do you a favor.
If you want to make a dangerous man your friend, let him do you a favor.
There's only one thing money won't buy, and that is poverty.
I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.
We can afford almost any mistake once.
I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.
A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.
It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got money.
You only live once - but if you work it right, once is enough.
Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.
I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.
I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves.
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.
It pays to get drunk with the best people.
I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would have taken General Custer and given points.
Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.
Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.
Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants on.
I always wake up at the crack of ice.
They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.
Boys, I have been rich and I have been poor, and believe me being rich is better.
I drink to forget I drink.
Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.
I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.
You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.
© 2020 Inspirational Stories
© 2020 Inspirational Stories