Spaghetti... I can't eat spaghetti, there's too many of them. No matter how hungry I am, 1000 of something is too many. I'll have 1000 pieces of noodles.
More Quotes from Mitch Hedberg:
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?Mitch Hedberg
I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.
Mitch Hedberg
I never joined the army because at ease was never that easy to me. Seemed rather uptight still. I don't relax by parting my legs slightly and putting my hands behind my back. That does not equal ease. At ease was not being in the military. I am at ease, bro, because I am not in the military.
Mitch Hedberg
I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.
Mitch Hedberg
I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
Mitch Hedberg
I saw some two-dollar bills today - They were for sale for eight dollars. Something went severely wrong there. What happened It spun out of control... Now it's worth eight, still says two. I miss the two. I could break a two.
Mitch Hedberg
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Based on Keywords: noodles, spaghettiIt's time to fundamentally change the way that we do business in Washington. To help build a new foundation for the 21st century, we need to reform our government so that it is more efficient, more transparent, and more creative. That will demand new thinking and a new sense of responsibility for every dollar that is spent.
Barack Obama
I don't listen to what art critics say. I don't know anybody who needs a critic to find out what art is.
Jean-Michel Basquiat
Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter who made the money.
Earl Wilson