I used to be a hot-tar roofer. Yeah, I remember that... day.
More Quotes from Mitch Hedberg:
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Spaghetti... I can't eat spaghetti, there's too many of them. No matter how hungry I am, 1000 of something is too many. I'll have 1000 pieces of noodles.
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Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'
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If my kid couldn't draw I'd make sure that my kitchen magnets didn't work.
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A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.
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Do you think I am standing here, making this up as I go? I am sorry to disillusion you. I am not Robin Williams. I am the king of the pen.
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