I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
More Quotes from Steven Wright:
I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.Steven Wright
Sorry ... my mind was wandering ... One time it went all the way to Venus and ordered a meal I couldn't pay for.
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My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.
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I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
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I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said 'pet supplies.' So I did. Then I went outside and saw a sign that said 'compact cars....'
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Borrow money from pessimists they don't expect it back.
Steven Wright
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