Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
More Quotes from W. C. Fields:
Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.W. C. Fields
I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. Fields
Happiness means quiet nerves.
W. C. Fields
After two days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
W. C. Fields
Lady Godiva put everything she had on a horse.
W. C. Fields
Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.
W. C. Fields
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