When My Love Comes Back from the Ladies' Room, Will I Be Too Old To Care
More Quotes from Lewis Grizzard:
Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.Lewis Grizzard
If Love Were Oil, I'd Be About a Quart Low.
Lewis Grizzard
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
Lewis Grizzard
If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
Lewis Grizzard
You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, 'What's in it for me?'
Lewis Grizzard
The public, more often than not, will forgive mistakes, but it will not forgive trying to wriggle and weasel out of one.
Lewis Grizzard
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No one is fit to judge a book until he has rounded Cape Horn in a sailing vessel, until he has bumped into two or three icebergs, until he has been lost in the sands of the desert, until he has spent a few years in the House of the Dead.Van Wyck Brooks
I worked offshore as an oil worker for a couple of years.
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I'd kill myself if I was as fat as Marilyn Monroe.
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