If you listen to a song and get an image in your head, and then you go home and watch mtv and the image they're showing is the same as the one in your head, kill yourself. You're better off coming back as a lobster.
More Quotes from Lewis Black:
There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.Lewis Black
If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it is now eating itself. That's why I believe there should be a psychiatrist at every health club, so that when they see you doing this, they will take you away for a little chat.
Lewis Black
When from behind me, a young woman of 25 uttered the following, it was the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life until Dan Quayle was elected Vice President of the United States. She said, if it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
Lewis Black
I'm going to make my transition to weatherman soon,
Lewis Black
All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.
Lewis Black
I had more material on weather than anyone else, I guess, ... back when I was traveling a lot on the road as a standup comic, between airport security and the weather...I just wanted to be prepared for sitting in the airport.
Lewis Black
Readers Who Like This Quotation Also Like:
Based on Keywords: lobsterI think you can find yourself on one of these shows for a long period of time and think that all you'll ever be able to do is that character. Certainly people think of you that way.
William Petersen
I have no regrets about launching Salon. For the life of me, I can't imagine doing anything else.
David Talbot
We cannot live, suffer or die for somebody else, for suffering is too precious to be shared.
Edward Dahlberg