I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
More Quotes from Mark Twain:
This morning arrives a letter from my ancient silver-mining comrade, Calvin H. Higbie, a man whom I have not seen nor had communication with for forty-four years.... Footnote Roughing It is dedicated to Higbie. ... I shall allow myself the privilege of copying his punctuation and his spelling, for to me they are a part of the man. He is as honest as the day is long. He is utterly simple-minded and straightforward, and his spelling and his punctuation are as simple and honest as he is himself. He makes no apology for them, and no apology is needed.Mark Twain
Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain't so.
Mark Twain
History does not repeat itself. But it does rhyme.
Mark Twain
But we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and we glorious Americans will occasionally astonish the God that created us when we get a fair start.
Mark Twain
Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough.
Mark Twain
When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.
Mark Twain
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I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds.
Quentin Crisp