When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
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My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.Rodney Dangerfield
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Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
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My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
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I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.
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I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
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Based on Topics: Mothers QuotesBased on Keywords: slapped
I think I've paid my dues. I've really put in a lot of time on set.
Victoria Pratt
Working together was a bit of a disaster. I'd tell him his ideas were cr*p and he'd say the same about mine.
Daisy Donovan
I cannot stand public attention, I just can't. Of course, if I may I might write something instead.
Elfriede Jelinek