Smoking cures weight problems ... eventually.
More Quotes from Steven Wright:
I put tape on my mirrors at my house so I won't accidentally walk through them into another dimension.Steven Wright
I was cesarean born. You can't really tell, although whenever I leave a house, I go out through a window.
Steven Wright
Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night.
Steven Wright
I bought a million lottery tickets. I won a dollar.
Steven Wright
I eat Swiss cheese. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger. I eat it from the inside out.
Steven Wright
Officer, I know I was going faster than 55 mile per hour, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour.
Steven Wright
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Donald Evans
He wasn't a great father. He was a great musician. That's always been a touchy one, and it will be until I can find the answer, but I don't know if there is one.
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Genre categories are irrelevant. I dislike them, but I do not have the casting vote.
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