Did you sleep well No, I made a couple of mistakes.
More Quotes from Steven Wright:
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.Steven Wright
My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH.
Steven Wright
I was on a ski lift with another person ... no one I knew ... and he didn't say a word until we were half way up the mountain ... then he said, 'I haven't been skiing in ten years.' I said, 'How come' He said, 'I was in jail.' I didn't say anything. He said, 'You wanna know why' I said, 'Not really.' He said, 'I'll tell you anyway ... I was jailed for pushing a complete stranger off a ferris wheel.' I said, 'Oh yeah, I remember you.'
Steven Wright
I've wanted to do it since I was 14 years old, from watching 'The Tonight Show,' watching Johnny (Carson) and the other comedians. Something clicked in me that I wanted to be one of those guys, someone who came out and made the audience laugh.
Steven Wright
I like to reminisce with people I don't know.
Steven Wright
I have a map of the United States ... actual size. It says, 'Scale 1 mile 1 mile' I spent last summer folding it.
Steven Wright
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Based on Topics: Error & Mistake QuotesNot only should we be giving Amtrak the money it needs to continue to provide services; we should be providing security money to upgrade their tracks and improve safety and security measures in the entire rail system.
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I work hard. I work 80-90 hours a week in part-time football.
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I did the best I could, and in some arenas, my best was not good enough. I've made some bad choices.
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