My mind works . . . two boobs never get me a job.
More Quotes from Erma Bombeck:
For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward.Erma Bombeck
There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.
Erma Bombeck
There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M.
Erma Bombeck
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
Erma Bombeck
The suburbs were discovered, quite by accident, one day in the early 1940's by a Welcome Wagon lady who was lost.
Erma Bombeck
At some point in your life if you're lucky you throw practicality to the wind andstart living.
Erma Bombeck
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