I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.
More Quotes from Dave Barry:
It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.Dave Barry
The taxpayers cannot be relied upon to support performing arts such as opera. As a taxpayer, I am forced to admit that I would rather undergo a vasectomy via Weed Whacker than attend an opera.
Dave Barry
Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
Dave Barry
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.
Dave Barry
The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.
Dave Barry
Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.
Dave Barry
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I could start with Mandelstam, who was a huge influence on my early writing.Helen Dunmore
I support development and deployment of a limited national missile defense. Few if any of our duties surpass our obligation to provide for the common defense of our nation.
Joe Lieberman
I was encouraged by my mother and, to a lesser extent, by my father.
Carlisle Floyd