I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
More Quotes from Woody Allen:
The universe is merely a fleeting idea in God's mind -- a pretty uncomfortable thought, particularly if you've just made a down payment on a house.Woody Allen
The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.
Woody Allen
I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife
Woody Allen
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.'
Woody Allen
I think people should mate for life, like pigeons or Catholics
Woody Allen
On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down .
Woody Allen
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Based on Topics: Laughter QuotesI finally reached the conclusion that mathematics was the study I was best fitted to follow, though I did not clearly see in what way I should turn the subject to account.
Simon Newcomb
What happened after publication of our paper was that, for the next 40 years, people said, all right, we now know the answer to the capital structure question under ideal conditions.
Merton Miller
Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.
P. J. ORourke