Gary Apple Quotes (9 Quotes)

Aladdin rubbed a lamp and a genie appeared. With my luck if I rubbed the lamp, I'd probably get an IRS auditor.

I'm not the man I used to be, so why should I have to pay off his debts.

Life is short to prove it, criminals sentenced to life get out in ten years.

I'm way overdue for a promotion. I've made so many lateral moves, I'm beside myself.

Can you believe the weather we are having Cold, windy and damp ... And I hear outdoors it's even worse.

You may not know this, but I'm an impressionist. Allow me to do my impression of a competent public speaker.

Times are tough for everyone. A small Bible publishing company just filed Chapter 11, Verses 1 through 14.

I'm fascinated by historical trivia. For example, George Washington had trouble flossing because his teeth kept catching fire.

That's a very good question. See me at the break, and I'll avoid answering it then, too.