Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?
More Quotes from Rita Rudner:
My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.Rita Rudner
Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before.
Rita Rudner
I never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
Rita Rudner
The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.
Rita Rudner
Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
Rita Rudner
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Based on Topics: Fire QuotesIf we desire to avoid insult, we must be able to repel it; if we desire to secure peace, one of the most powerful instruments of our rising prosperity, it must be known, that we are at all times ready for War.
George Washington
The photograph reverses the purpose of travel, which until now had been to encounter the strange and unfamiliar.
Marshall McLuhan
I first began to dry specimens for preservation carelessly perhaps at first, but before the season was over, I had collected between one and two hundred species.
George Bentham