I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories.
More Quotes from Dave Barry:
The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.Dave Barry
I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
Dave Barry
Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
Dave Barry
You can use the Internet to find out, from anywhere on the planet exactly how much coffee is in a certain coffee machine at Cambridge University in England exactly how many sodas are available in certain vending machines at certain major universities and much, much more.
Dave Barry
The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.
Dave Barry
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Based on Topics: Facts QuotesThere is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.
Albert Camus
You know that I am living proof that the American Dream is real. Growing up, our congressman cut through government bureaucratic red tape to help my mom buy our first house. That's the kind of congressman I'll be.
Geoff Davis
I've had hard coaches all my life.
Chris Webber