The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves.
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The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then he's alive, then dead, then alive. It's just confusing. Today they showed videotape, and Saddam was speaking at his own funeral.
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Everyone has this sense of togetherness right now. For example, one guy on the subway today, he wanted to share my pants.
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People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.
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There is a new billboard outside Time Square. It keeps an up-to-minute count of gun-related crimes in New York. Some goofball is going to shoot someone just to see the numbers move.
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For the love of God, folks, don't try this at home.
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