Scott Roeben Quotes (8 Quotes)

I was on a game show. When I lost, they gave me a lovely parting gift. It was a comb.

I have no luck with women. I once went on a date and asked the woman if she'd brought any protection. She pulled a switchblade on me.

I only date stewardesses. Or maybe it just seems that way. Women always seem to be showing me the exits.

I had a rough childhood. When I was born, the doctor advised me of my rights.

I once dated a girl on the track team. It didn't work out. She kept giving me the runaround.

There's only one thing wrong with wife swapping. You get another wife.

They say God has existed from the beginning of time and will exist beyond the end of time. Can you imagine trying to sit through his home movies

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.