I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
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That's what it's like to be a comedian. You basically stand and stare at the world and hope it craps out cause that's a good year for you. So that's not a pleasant feeling.Jon Stewart
Senator John McCain, who spent over five years in a Vietnamese POW camp, publicly releases 1,000 pages of medical records. Now people are left with only open nagging questions what kind of freak has 1,000 pages of medical records
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Sheep are not considered the most intelligent animals but British scientist say humans may have underestimated the woolly creatures. In fact, the British scientific community is even suggesting that the animals might even be Irish-smart.
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I am a tiny, neurotic man, standing in the back of the room throwing tomatoes at the chalk board. And that's really it. And what we do is we come in in the morning and we go, Did you see that thing last night Aahh And then we spend the next 8 or 9 hours trying to take this and make it into something funny.
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McVeigh's lawyer got him the death penalty, which, quite frankly, I could have done.
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A boy child, I feel like I'll know how to deal with it if he has a problem. I'll just be able to say to him, 'Well, repress it,' and he will hopefully swallow that, as I have. And then you figure you have 30 years before it comes out over dinner where somebody spills the gravy and then you're like, 'I hate you'
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Johnny Rotten
Winning teams have the least amount of distractions. They have a really tight group of people working towards the same common goal.
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Never insult anyone by accident.
Robert A. Heinlein