I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.
More Quotes from Elayne Boosler:
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me.Elayne Boosler
People are giving birth underwater now. They say it's less traumatic for the baby because it's in water. But certainly more traumatic for the other people in the pool.
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When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.
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When the sun comes up, I have morals again.
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