Well, you know, just some old man all alone. God, I hope I don't end up alone like that. Some pathetic old woman with nobody to go on a whale watch with.
("Running With Scissors")
More Quotes from Augusten Burroughs:
I just look at her and she creeps me out. She looks like she would eat a baby. Not that she's fat. She just looks hungry in some dangerous way that can't be explained. She's always so nice and friendly. Exactly the disposition of a baby killer.Augusten Burroughs
I felt deeply tricked. Stunned. And furious. I also felt my default emotion: numbness.
Augusten Burroughs
I love to both give and receive very old books.
Augusten Burroughs
I've just finished my next collection, Possible Side Effects, and I'm now working on a collection of holiday stories as well as a memoir about my relationship with my father.
Augusten Burroughs
I did not consider him to be any kind of a genius. I considered him deeply lacking in the area that mattered most in life. Star quality.
Augusten Burroughs
Doctor, if being a bitch is healthy, then I am the healthiest damn woman on the face of the earth
Augusten Burroughs
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