Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.
More Quotes from Ambrose Bierce:
REFERENDUM, n. A law for submission of proposed legislation to a popular vote to learn the nonsensus of public opinion.Ambrose Bierce
CONFIDANT, CONFIDANTE, n. One entrusted by A with the secrets of B, confided by 'him' to C.
Ambrose Bierce
COMFORT, n. A state of mind produced by contemplation of a neighbor's uneasiness.
Ambrose Bierce
ZANY, n. A popular character in old Italian plays, who imitated with ludicrous incompetence the 'buffone', or clown, and was therefore the ape of an ape for the clown himself imitated the serious characters of the play.
Ambrose Bierce
HYPOCHONDRIASIS, n. Depression of one's own spirits.
Ambrose Bierce
INFIDEL, n. In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion in Constantinople, one who does.
Ambrose Bierce
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