Was it you, mother, with your tearful song,
was it you who cursed me three years’ long
to be a luckless, drifting waif
and meet all those my soul most hates?
Have I drunk away my father’s cash,
have I torn deep wounds upon your flesh,
that my tender bud of youth, o mother,
in agony should wilt and wither?
To all my friends I seem so gay
for when I am with them we laugh and jest,
but they don’t know I pine away
for my youth is nipped by heavy frost.
How should they know? I can’t reveal
to a single friend what my soul conceals,
whom I’m in love with or what I believe –
my dreams, my thoughts – or why I grieve.
Except for you – you’re all I have,
to you I give my faith and love;
yet, even so, I’m prey to doubt,
for though I love – my heart burns out.
Time and again I’ve imagined, mother,
that we would find glory and joy together;
I felt so strong – how I aspired –
now dig a grave for my desires.
You, forlorn and alone, remain:
may I yet fall in your open arms,
that my soul of torment, heart of pain,
seek from your wretchedness its calm.
Father, sister, brothers, mine –
I want to embrace you, full of love,
then may the blood freeze in my veins
and let me rot within the grave.
(Khristo Botev)
More Poetry from Khristo Botev:
Khristo Botev Poems based on Topics: Brothers, Youth, Mothers, Fathers, Sadness, Love, Hatred, Pain, Time, Dreams, Sisters- Haidouks (Khristo Botev Poems)
- On Parting (Khristo Botev Poems)
- Eloped (Khristo Botev Poems)
- The Struggle (Khristo Botev Poems)
- A Cloud Of Darkness Has Appeared (Khristo Botev Poems)
- To My First Love (Khristo Botev Poems)