Dear friends, I’m Deakin….
No; no mistake,
You’re wide awake.
It’s ALF that’s speakin’…
I wish to make
A few remarks about – Eh? What,
O, no; I’m not
The least bit changed.
It’s been arranged –
You understand?
Between these gentlemen and me.
We fused, you see,
For the – er – welfare of the land….
Come, gentlemen! I do insist
I am the same!
I’m DEAKIN, the Protectionist.
And I declare I’m not to blame.
There never has been any change in me.
It’s all arranged…. We fused, you see.
No harm to fuse.
And I am certain you’ll excuse
Us all, when once you fairly grasp the fact
That this arrangement is a patriot’s act.
‘Twas neither somersault nor slip;
‘Twas statesmanship….
Yes, yes. Joe Cook
And others took
A pledge.
As I allege,
Henceforth to vote Protection to a man….
Well, yes; they ran
Freetrade – some years ago;
But they won’t advocate it now. Oh, no!…
I say again I’ve not changed in the least.
I leave that all to them.
Their love for the – er – tariff has increased.
Ahem!….
What? Wobblers? Nay!
Ah, do not blame them, pray!
These gentlemen are neither false nor weak;
But my good friends.
And they will make amends.
A light has broken on them, so to speak.
They’re all – er – fiscal converts as it were….
Now, my dear sir!
If you will interject
Time and again,
How can the audience expect
Me to explain?…
I tell you I’ve NOT changed!
It’s ALL ARRANGED!
Why, ever since I’ve been in politics
I’ve always advocated the – um – er …
What nonsense! Sir!!
Tricks!
ME!!!
I challenge you to prove my policy
Has ever been… Well, yes,
Yes, I confess
I used to call them names. But, don’t you see,
That is a thing of ancient history….
I tell you it has now all been arranged!
And I’ve not changed!…
O, well, well, I admit
I did abuse them – just a little bit.
“The wreckage of all parties” – That was it.
“Black Labor party” – yes, and “Tories,” too.
I said that; true.
But can’t you see? I ask you, please, to try.
They’ve changed, not I.
They’ve had a wash;
They’ve all been made
Whiter than snow ( I’m sure you understand);
And henceforth Anti-Sosh,
And not Freetrade,
Will be their party brand.
But, to return to my….Eh? Who’s that speakin’?
I tell you I am Deakin!
Who dares to say I’m not?
I am the same brave, whole-souled patriot!
Iam! I AM!
if you will interject… O, d—!….
Er – gentlemen…I’d have you understand
We are a band
Of staunch Protectionists. If it appears
A trifle strange
That, after all these years,
These gentlemen should change,
I ask you, gentlemen, to please excuse
The Fuse.
You comprehend? I wave my magic wand,
And they respond
By bowing meekly to my fiscal creed.
Nay, nay! No Greed
For Office caused this unaccustomed sight.
‘Twas…Country-love and – er – a Sudden Light.
These friends of mine have all come into line,
And, after this, their fiscal faith is mine –
That is…I mean to say
That mine is theirs until the Judgement Day.
I trust, good people, I have made it plain….
No, no; my friends will never change again….
I tell you, with my hand upon my heart,
They would no more trick me than, for my part, I’d ever do
So false an act, or think of tricking…you.
(C J Dennis)
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Based on Topics: Man Poems, Light Poems, Sense & Perception Poems, Friendship Poems, Belief & Faith Poems, People Poems, Speaking Poems, Courage Poems, Change Poems, Trust Poems, Facts PoemsBased on Keywords: speakin, converts, tories, somersault, tariff, allege, ahem, tricking, statesmanship, fiscal, freetrade