Sir, — I try to do my duty as a patriotic man
With sane views about the science of gastronomy;
And I’d ask the promulgators of each food consuming plan
To consider man’s interior economy.
I shall not go into details. But I merely wish to say
My observance hitherto has been meticulous
Of the many noble slogans: but I fear the scheme today
Has at last begun to merge with the ridiculous.
Very nobly I responded to the urge to “Eat More Fruit”;
I bought it and consumed it with avidity.
I was keen to serve my country; and the diet seemd to suit
(If we waive a tendency to slight acidity)
Then the ringing slogan sounded thro’ the contry: “Eat More Wheat!”
I assimilated faithfully that cereal
Then we were asked to eat more eggs, to eat more oats, more meat;
While tissue waxed — both moral and material.
And now, sir, to my horror, “Eat more butter” is the plan.
But I ask you: Can I hope to rise superior?
There are symptoms. And I fear the patriotic outer man
Is at issue, so to speak, with the interior,
On, I long to do my gastronomic duty; yet I shrink
I shudder — tho’ I swear I am no sceptic —
But butter! Slabs of butter! There are limits, don’t you think?
Sir, I remain,
Yours faithfully,
“DYSPEPTIC.”
(C J Dennis)
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Based on Topics: Man Poems, Speaking Poems, Countries Poems, Planning Poems, Duty Poems, Science Poems, Diet PoemsBased on Keywords: tendency, patriotic, seemd, slogan, symptoms, observance, sceptic, dyspeptic, waive, meticulous, cereal