When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
More Quotes from Rodney Dangerfield:If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.
At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
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Nigeria has no business with poverty. With our human and material resources, we shall strive to eradicate poverty from our country.
Nobody should pin their hopes on a miracle.
I'm running for senator because it's time for a change.