Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.
More Quotes from Mitch Hedberg:
Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.Mitch Hedberg
I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because then I tried to walk out and slammed the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation Zipper it up really quick.
Mitch Hedberg
I bought a seven-dollar pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.
Mitch Hedberg
One time a guy handed me a picture. He said, 'Here's a picture of me when I was younger.' Every picture is of you when you were younger. 'Here's a picture of me when I'm older.' 'You son of bit, how'd you pull that off Let me see that camera. What's it look like'
Mitch Hedberg
I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.
Mitch Hedberg
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Based on Keywords: backpack, midget, strangled, turtleneckDream in a pragmatic way.
Aldous Huxley
The responsibility of commanding the invasion fell to me, and the task was assigned to my Army Group.
Gerd von Rundstedt
If only those who dream about Hollywood knew how difficult it all is.
Greta Garbo