Government investigations have always contributed more to our amusement than they have to our knowledge.
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law and every time they make a law it's a joke.
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
As bad as we sometimes think our government is run, it is the best run I ever saw.
Lord, the money we do spend on government, and it's not one bit better than the government that we got for one-third the money 20 years ago.
The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
I never lack material for my humor column when Congress is in session.
There is good news from Washington today. Congress is deadlocked and can't act.
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
If they wasn't in congress, why, they would be doing something else against us that might be even worse.
England elects a Labour Government. When a man goes in for politics over here, he has no time to labor, and any man that labors has no time to fool with politics. Over there politics is an obligation over here it's a business.
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
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