Jerry Seinfield Quotes (4 Quotes)

I see TV ads about detergents that can get blood stains out of your cloths. I say if you have blood stains on your cloths you should be thinking about something other than laundry

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup'

Men we drive ourselves crazy. Men always want to marry a virgin, but during the act of sex on the wedding night we tell the women to say 'you're the best, you're the best', then afterwards we wonder better than who

There is one service men provide to women everywhere, regardless of race or culture, and that is courting. 3 billion men on earth, all willing to provide this service at anytime, in any place. By the way, men go about their daily business for one purpose... to get the attention of women. Like the guy coming out of his space-ship, he's been in orbit for 3 weeks first woman he sees he'll be like, 'So, did you see me up there'