Drew Carey Quotes (40 Quotes)


    I had no problem going into retirement mode, ... I do what other retired guys do. I putter around the house and travel.

    I'm not against ratings per se. I think more information is always good. But I certainly don't think the government has to step in and set guidelines for how shows should be rated.

    When I play poker, I don't like losing the pot.

    Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

    When the show's in production, we work for three weeks at a time and then take a week off.


    Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has led to the rise of the gang problems we have now.

    There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with it.

    Nothing's funny about someone who's successful.

    The laughs are honestly bigger, ... They are the kind of unexpected belly laughs you get with your friends during conversation.

    Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.


    The first Monopoly game I played with my brothers, I hated losing so much, I just had to beat them.

    I've got to say that I don't see myself as some sort of political type like Alec Baldwin or Barbra Streisand. I don't want to come across like that.

    As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with your life, it should never have to do with the government. You should never depend on the government for your retirement, your financial security, for anything.

    We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.

    Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face.

    When I'm working, I'm going to avoid all media. No newspapers, no magazines, no movies, no radio, no TV. I'm just going to do creative work.

    Hollywood people are filled with guilt: white guilt, liberal guilt, money guilt. They feel bad that they're so rich, they feel they don't work that much for all that money - and they don't, for the amount of money they make.

    People laugh to forget their troubles, and to forget their troubles they like to look at people who aren't doing better than they are.

    Some people don't like competition because it makes them work harder, better.

    When Carey discusses what might be on the horizon, he sounds as indecisive as a high school senior. That's what it feels like, ... Should I go to college or go to work with my father I could always stay retired.

    Nevada's one of the most conservative states in the Union, but you can do what you want in Vegas and nobody judges you.

    The TV season is a year-long thing now, and the networks are starting to look at it that way, thanks to cable, satellites, and competition.

    I didn't see it coming, ... But Comedy Central wanted to do it and will air all 13 shows that we did. That's why I'm going out on this tour. If the show wasn't picked up, I would probably be flying off to a sporting event or something in October. I wanted to take a couple of years off, but that will have to wait because of the show and the tour.

    I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

    When asked if he enjoys being famous Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don't. I've always been a people watcher. I like to go to malls and just sit, and I can't do that very easily anymore.

    Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with.

    I can't think of a worse place to be, without a passport, without any money, ... Then you'd be really screwed.

    I love the normalcy of Cleveland. There's regular people there.

    I loved the old stories in National Lampoon, like the original story the movie Vacation was based on. I used to laugh at them until I cried.

    You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither.

    someone once said that there'd be no wars if women ran the world..... well that's a load of crap.. i'm sure that no one would start a fight for no reason if women ran the world...

    But I don't want to lose touch with things like eating in Bob's Big Boy.

    Vegas is everything that's right with America. You can do whatever you want, 24 hours a day. They've effectively legalized everything there.

    That's the great thing about having your friends around you. I've known these guys forever. I really enjoy their company just as people. You couldn't ask for a better work environment.

    I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?

    What also helps our show is that we never take ourselves seriously.

    I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

    I wanted to do a show based on what my life would be like if I had never become a comedian.

    When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.


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