Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
DISTANCE, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs, and keep.
KLEPTOMANIAC, n. A rich thief.
MAUSOLEUM, n. The final and funniest folly of the rich.
BRAIN, n. An apparatus with which we think what we think. That which distinguishes the man who is content to be something from the man who wishes to do something. A man of great wealth, or one who has been pitchforked into high station, has commo.
RICH, adj. Holding in trust and subject to an accounting the property of the indolent, the incompetent, the unthrifty, the envious and the luckless.
IMPUNITY, n. Wealth.
GOUT, n. A physician's name for the rheumatism of a rich patient.
POVERTY, n. A file provided for the teeth of the rats of reform. Its victims are distinguished by possession of all the virtues and by their faith in leaders seeking to conduct them into a prosperity where they believe these to be unknown.
PLUNDER, v. To take the property of another without observing the decent and customary reticences of theft. To wrest the wealth of A from B and leave C lamenting a vanishing opportunity.
Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
PHILANTHROPIST, n. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his conscience is picking his pocket.
COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E.
QUOTIENT, n. A number showing how many times a sum of money belonging to one person is contained in the pocket of another usually about as many times as it can be got there.
MONEY, n. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it. An evidence of culture and a passport to polite society. Supportable property.
© 2020 Inspirational Stories
© 2020 Inspirational Stories