My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
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My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we metRodney Dangerfield
I'm so ugly - I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get
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Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
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I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.
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One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control
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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
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Nothing the desert produces expresses it better than the unhappy growth of the tree yuccas.
Mary Austin
When you blame others, you give up your power to change.
Robert Anthony