Say, I was on The Craig Kilbourne Show and the next day I flew to Minneapolis. I was at the airport and a guy came up. He said, 'Dude, I saw you on TV last night.' But he did not say whether or not he thought I was good, he just confirmed that I was on television. So I turned my head away from him for about a minute, then I turned it back. I said, 'Dude, I saw you at the airport about a minute ago. And you were good.'
More Quotes from Mitch Hedberg:
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?Mitch Hedberg
Sometimes I fall asleep at night with my clothes on. I'm going to have all my clothes made out of blankets.
Mitch Hedberg
I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.
Mitch Hedberg
I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.
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My apartment is infested with koala bears. It's the cutest infestation ever... Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light, a bunch of koala bears scatter. And I don't want 'em to. I'm like, 'Hey, hold on fellas - Let me hold one of you.'
Mitch Hedberg
I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
Mitch Hedberg
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