I wrote my friend a letter using a highlighting pen. But he could not read it, he thought I was trying to show him certain parts of a piece of paper.
More Quotes from Mitch Hedberg:
Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn't even get his degree.Mitch Hedberg
I like to close my eyes on the stage, because I have drawn a picture of an audience enjoying the show more on the back of my eyelids.
Mitch Hedberg
Foosball screwed up my perception of soccer. I though you had to kick the ball and then spin around and around. I can't do a back flip, much less several simultaneously with two other guys.
Mitch Hedberg
I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. There's a large out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside.
Mitch Hedberg
Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right.
Mitch Hedberg
I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.
Mitch Hedberg
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I have a huge ego and a huge inferiority complex at the same time.
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You have a right to your opinion about the work that you're doing. An artist is as equally important as the director. If you believe that, you can work in any circumstances.
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