Adam was the luckiest man he had no mother-in-law.
More Quotes from Mark Twain:
An author values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency.Mark Twain
I said there was nothing so convincing to an Indian as a general massacre. If he could not approve of the massacre, I said the next surest thing for an Indian was soap and education. Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run because a half-massacred Indian may recover, but if you educate him and wash him, it is bound to finish him some time or other.
Mark Twain
In the South, the war is what A. D. is elsewhere they date from it.
Mark Twain
When angry count four when very angry, swear.
Mark Twain
It is often the case that the man who can't tell a lie thinks he is the best judge of one
Mark Twain
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
Mark Twain
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History has shown us all too often the consequences of dreaming poorly or not at all.
Jeff Vandermeer
True happiness is... to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca