YOKE, n. An implement, madam, to whose Latin name, jugum, we owe one of the most illuminating words in our language --a word that defines the matrimonial situation with precision, point and poignancy. A thousand apologies for withholding it.
More Quotes from Ambrose Gwinett Bierce:
OBSESSED, p. p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was once more common than it is now. Arasthus tells of a peasant who was occupied by a different devil for every day in the week, and on Sundays by two. They were frequently seen, always walking in his shadow, when he had one, but were finally driven away by the village notary, a holy man but they took the peasant with them, for he vanished utterly. A devil thrown out of a woman by the Archbishop of Rheims ran through the trees, pursued by a hundred persons, until the open country was reached, where by a leap higher than a church spire he escaped into a bird. A chaplain in Cromwell's army exorcised a soldier's obsessing devil by throwing the soldier into the water, when the devil came to the surface. The soldier, unfortunately, did not.Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
DISTRESS, n. A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
SENATE, n. A body of elderly gentlemen charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
Age. That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
I is the first letter of the alphabet, the first word of the language, the first thought of the mind, the first object of affection. In grammar it is a pronoun of the first person and singular number. Its plural is said to be We, but how there can be more than one myself is doubtless clearer the grammarians than it is to the author of this incomparable dictionary. Conception of two myselfs is difficult, but fine. The frank yet graceful use of I distinguishes a good writer from a bad the latter carries it with the manner of a thief trying to cloak his loot.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
LOGIC, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. The basic of logic is the syllogism, consisting of a major and a minor premise and a conclusion --thusMajor Premise Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly as one man.Minor Premise One man can dig a posthole in sixty seconds therefore --Conclusion Sixty men can dig a posthole in one second. This may be called the syllogism arithmetical, in which, by combining logic and mathematics, we obtain a double certainty and are twice blessed.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
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Based on Topics: Name QuotesBased on Keywords: illuminating, matrimonial, poignancy
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