CORPORAL, n. A man who occupies the lowest rung of the military ladder.Fiercely the battle raged and, sad to tell, Our corporal heroically fell Fame from her height looked down upon the brawl And said He hadn't very far to fall. --Giacomo Smith
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WEREWOLF, n. A wolf that was once, or is sometimes, a man. All werewolves are of evil disposition, having assumed a bestial form to gratify a beastial appetite, but some, transformed by sorcery, are as humane and is consistent with an acquired taste for human flesh. Some Bavarian peasants having caught a wolf one evening, tied it to a post by the tail and went to bed. The next morning nothing was there Greatly perplexed, they consulted the local priest, who told them that their captive was undoubtedly a werewolf and had resumed its human for during the night. The next time that you take a wolf, the good man said, see that you chain it by the leg, and in the morning you will find a Lutheran.Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
HALO, n. Properly, a luminous ring encircling an astronomical body, but not infrequently confounded with aureola, or nimbus, a somewhat similar phenomenon worn as a head-dress by divinities and saints. The halo is a purely optical illusion, produced by moisture in the air, in the manner of a rainbow but the aureola is conferred as a sign of superior sanctity, in the same way as a bishop's mitre, or the Pope's tiara. In the painting of the Nativity, by Szedgkin, a pious artist of Pesth, not only do the Virgin and the Child wear the nimbus, but an ass nibbling hay from the sacred manger is similarly decorated and, to his lasting honor be it said, appears to bear his unaccustomed dignity with a truly saintly grace.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
DEAD, adj.Done with the work of breathing done With all the world the mad race run Though to the end the golden goal Attained and found to be a hole --Squatol Johnes
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
New York is too strenuous for me it gets on my nerves
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
PALM, n. A species of tree having several varieties, of which the familiar itching palm (Palma hominis) is most widely distributed and sedulously cultivated. This noble vegetable exudes a kind of invisible gum, which may be detected by applying to the bark a piece of gold or silver. The metal will adhere with remarkable tenacity. The fruit of the itching palm is so bitter and unsatisfying that a considerable percentage of it is sometimes given away in what are known as benefactions.
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
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Based on Topics: Man Quotes, Military Quotes, Sadness Quotes, War & Peace QuotesBased on Keywords: corporal, heroically, raged
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