A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.
More Quotes from Dennis Miller:
Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to tell you the truth? Most of us are not going to care if they don't find these weapons of mass destruction. It's enough for a lot of us to see those kids smiling on that street again.Dennis Miller
There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.
Dennis Miller
There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.
Dennis Miller
The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.
Dennis Miller
A new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry's appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away.
Dennis Miller
The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found truffles in Iraq.
Dennis Miller
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Based on Topics: Running QuotesAs long as my body is in shape, my mind is working at its full capacity.
Victoria Principal
My only feeling about superstition is that it's unlucky to be behind at the end of the game.
Duffy Daugherty
People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them... Well, it's killing me!
Wendy Liebman