One day a tortoise will learn how to fly.
("Small Gods")
More Quotes from Terry Pratchett:
Sister Mary was a nurse and nurses, whatever their creed, are primarily nurses, which had a lot to do with wearing your watch upside down, keeping calm in emergencies, and dying for a cup of tea.Terry Pratchett
Aziraphale collected books. If he were totally honest with himself he would have to have admitted that his bookshop was simply somewhere to store them. He was not unusual in this. In order to maintain his cover as a typical second-hand book seller, he used every means short of actual physical violence to prevent customers from making a purchase. Unpleasant damp smells, glowering looks, erratic opening hours - he was incredibly good at it.
Terry Pratchett
Either dragons should exist completely or fail to exist at all, he felt. A dragon only half-existing was worse than the extremes.
Terry Pratchett
Bishops move diagonally. That's why they often turn up where the kings don't expect them to be.
Terry Pratchett
Moist was sure doctors keep skeletons around to cow patients. Nyer, nyer, we know what you look underneath ...
Terry Pratchett
One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.
Terry Pratchett
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To keep your secret is wisdom; to expect others to keep it is folly.
William Samuel Johnson