Wilson Mizner Quotes (56 Quotes)


    The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.

    I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

    Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

    A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.




    Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.

    There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.

    I have known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, but never had a thought.

    When you take stuff from one writer it's plagiarism but when you take it from many writers, it's research.

    Many a live wire would be a dead one except for his connections

    Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.

    If you count all your assets you always show a profit.

    I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile.

    The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.

    I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.

    Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

    There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.

    Copy from one, it's plagiarism copy from two, it's research.

    The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book

    It is not in life, but in art that self-fulfillment is to be found.

    Why should I talk to you I've just been talking to your boss.

    A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.

    I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.

    The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

    The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.

    Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

    Women can instantly see through each other, and it's surprising how little they observe that's pleasant.

    I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.

    In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch; Tact is the clever footwork.

    The only bird that gives the poor a real tumble is the stork

    Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it in time.

    Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you

    A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

    Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.


    Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.

    Some of the greatest love affairs I've known involved one actor, unassisted.

    The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.

    To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

    I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.

    The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.

    Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor unassisted.

    All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.

    To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.

    Always be nice to people on the way up because you'll meet the same people on the way down.

    A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.


    Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.



    More Wilson Mizner Quotations (Based on Topics)


    Performance Arts - Movies - Education - Learning - Art - Life - Mind - Woman - Belief & Faith - Thought & Thinking - Doubt & Skepticism - Marriage - World - Citizen - Time - God - Sleep - Fate & Destiny - Mastery & Expertise - View All Wilson Mizner Quotations

    Related Authors


    Tennessee Williams - George Bernard Shaw - Philippe Quinault - Jean Racine - Henry Taylor - Henry Porter - George S. Kaufman - George Colman - Anton Chekhov - Alexandre Dumas


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