Peter Sellers Quotes (25 Quotes)

Women are more difficult to handle than men. It's their minds.

Clouseau Do you have a REUM Inn Keeper I do not know what a REUM iz Clouseau Zimma Inn Keeper Ahhh.. a RRRUUUMMM Clouseau That is what I have been saying you idiot REUM.

Clouseau Does yer dewg bite Inn Keeper No Clouseau Nice Doggy (bends down to pet a dachshund it snarls and bites him) I thought you said yer dewg did not bite Inn Keeper Zat ... iz not my dog.

I feel ghostly unreal until I become somebody else again on the screen.

Francois Gesundheit Clouseau Yes, I kneow that, I kneow that.

Dreyfus MINKEY You said MINKEY Clouseau Yes... a Chimpanzee Minkey.

Finally, in conclusion, let me say just this.

Ecstatic over the total annihilation of the Earth, Dr. Strangelove 'resurrects' himself, miraculously regaining his ability to walk. His mechanical, robot-like body rises out of his wheelchair, crying exultantly 'Sir I have a plan. Heh.' (He realizes he is standing up.) 'Mein Fuehrer, I can walk'

Housekeeper You've ruined that piano Clouseau What is the price of one piano, compared to the terrible crime that has been committed here Housekeeper But that's a priceless Steinway Clouseau Nyot Anymeur.

Special delivery, a behm, were you expecting one ... A Behm Ahhhaaaahhhaaaoooww.

If you ask me to play myself, I will not know what to do. I do not know who or what I am.

I am here to fix the problem with yer pheaun.

This IZ Chief Inspector Clouseau speaking on the pheaun.

Mehrder . . what Mehrder.

There is no me. I do not exist. There used to be a me but I had it surgically removed.

Is there anybody hiding there in the dark.

Madame, that is by far the ugliest nose I have ever seen and I compliment you on it, it suits you.

There used to be a real me, but I had it surgically removed.

Relax, I'll get it. (said to Kato after Clouseau knocks him unconscious)

To see me as a person on screen would be one of the dullest experiences you could ever wish to experience.

Francois Do you know what kind of a bomb it was Clouseau Yes, the exploding kind.

There used to be a me behind the mask, but I had it surgically removed.

You'll catch your death of cold. Clouseau Yes, yes I probably will but ... its all part of life's rich pageantry, you kneau.

I'm a classic example of all humorists - only funny when I'm working.

Conversation like television set on honeymoon... unnecessary.